When you care about everyone’s opinion, you care about noone’s. Especially your own.

“Smart” phones deserve a warning label.

It’s too easy to start, and too hard to leave. When you’re in the middle, it feels so good, and when it ends, you know it’ll hurt, so you try to avoid the end by indulging the addiction. But the more you indulge, the later it gets, the more it will hurt. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy of pain. You want to feel good so bad that you’re willing to hurt yourself.

Life is a pretty good antidote for digital/distraction addiction.

When you have the wrong kind of paint to touch up a wall, you repaint the wall. Reminds me of a kid who reminds me of Tom Sawyer, goes everywhere shoeless. He said he’s good at reading, so I asked him if he’s read The Adventures of Tom Sawyer. Guess not.

Her eyes turned a cruel shade, filled with wounded malice. "What makes your pain different from anyone else's? Take a godd*mn look in the mirror, and stop throwing a pity party for yourself. Look outside yourself! There is an entire world out there!"
"Like you're any better! I may live in a world of delusional hypocrites, but at least I see the sh*tshow as it is! You think you can make a change? YOU go see your f *cking world. IT'S BURNING!" He spat, feeling the bile rising to his throat.
"And meanwhile, you get all pissy at me, because I don't attend the same bullsh*t talks that you do, don't share your 'altruistic virtues,' your 'amazing selflessness'. It's a f *cking excuse to validate yourself, make you better than the rest of us, and YOU need to see that!" He picked himself up, pacing across the room furiously.
"So don't you dare call me delusional, when you're the one living in a cloud, and don't expect me to change for your expectations, your virtues, your ideas!" He shouted, spittle flying from his mouth like a rabid dog. 
She stood paralyzed with distressed hair, statuesque and strained in her victimhood, breaking her stuttering silence with a scream.
"Fine! Just sit here and think yourself into a coma for Christ's sake! Why the f*ck did I ever think I could change you? You can gaze down on the world from your ivory tower for all I care until you throw yourself off a cliff! Why did I ever try to help you?"
 Suddenly weary, he sank into the couch, murmuring. "What I need help with, you can't help."
"I don't know what you need help with, Connor. But I can't help you. This, this... relationship isn't working for me. I think I need to go stay somewhere," she said, brushing hair out of her face. Now that the bout of anger was over, she looked wilted. Like a flower.
"Where?" he asked, as she strode towards the door.
"I don't know. Somewhere far away."
"Will you text?"
She turned to stare at him. "I'll think about it."
With that, the door slid quietly shut.
It was a long time before he stopped sobbing.

Chemistry is Algebra for nature. Also, I learned that sound effects are made by people and studios, not on-set. No wonder the sound on our film sucked. Sound is everything!

This isn’t a Klondike Bar; It’s a square. Rectangular, perhaps, but this is second-grade knowledge! If you didn’t know this, I don’t know what to do for you. ;)

The more I stare, the less I see,

The thinking man could never be.

In wonder, content and happy.

(A string of God, I give to thee.)

I’m angry that I’m a coward. I’m angry that you’re winning. I’m angry that I’m a failure. I don’t care what you say, I’m angry that you try to comfort me. Nobody knows me, they can’t mean it, they can’t understand. I know I’m spoiled, and I’m angry, and that makes me more angry. More of a failure.

I’m angry that I let myself get distracted. I’m angry that I enjoy it. I’m angry, because I don’t have time to do the things I like to do, I’m busy being angry and distracting myself. I’m angry, because I still haven’t cleaned up the dog shit on the porch.

I’m angry that you tricked me. I’m angry I believe(d) it. I’m angry I don’t know whether or what I should believe. I’m angry that I let myself not know what to believe.

I’m angry that the world is burning. I’m angry I don’t know what to do. I’m angry that people still try to sell me their world-view. Let me sell you mine. But I’m too polite. And that makes me angry.

I’m angry that I hide it behind a mask. I’m angry I think I have to. I’m angry that I am angry about whether I should hide behind a mask.

But you’ll never see it.

Don’t tell me to “speak” and “make a stand,” when you’re the one who says the election is rigged. You yourselves know that a vote of an celebrity-aristocrat-billionaire is worth more than the vote of a peasant. Stop trying to play with me and shut up. The billionaires happened to favor you this year. Or is it that they don’t exist, and you just make up stories whenever someone you don’t like is in office?

Money is not an enabler. It traps your brain into thinking you need more money to be able to do more, but that’s not true. If you want to do something badly enough, you’ll find a way. The only one stopping you is you. Look in the mirror.

If you need proof to have faith, then you have no faith.

fishers of men.

What the hell?

t.me/ItalyQano…

I wish people were still awesome. If you want a change in the world, you have to go make it. But if I want to change others, shouldn’t I change myself first? Confusion.

An affirmation of life: If you don’t die, kill yourself. If you almost get hit by a car, walk calmly inside and consume all the sugar in the household.

I remember Thoreau saying something about pyramids and skyscrapers; people constantly want to one-up each other, building higher and higher. When does it end? When there is no stone left to make the monuments of tomorrow, are we going to fly to Mars?

Thoreau said he didn’t want to know who the builders of whatever monument were, he wanted to know who didn’t build the monument and saw it as a waste of time. Funny.

There are two kinds of people: those who wake up at six in the morning, and those who go to bed at six.

How can you expect to succeed if you never give yourself a chance to fail? We’re so scared of failure we never give ourselves a chance to succeed.

Everybody fails at first. Just keep going. If you love it, there should be no problem in perfecting (and failing) in your passion.

[Rant Begin]

Since when did we decide that holidays are things to attack? I mean, honestly, are there no better ways to spend our time than to attack time-honored traditions, some of which centuries old, which encourage us to gather round and enjoy each other’s company (and maybe realize that we’re all human beings)? Is the gathering and eating of food offensive to some random few, that must garner our attention so that we cease to celebrate something, anything at all?

It reminds me of Communism. I smell Commies… Rather than destroy all Holidays in favor of the New World Order, we’ll simply replace them so that your celebrations are organized by us, created by us, and designed to encourage our ideas. One Nation under Communism.

Do not wish me a Happy Thanksgiving, or a Happy Hanukkah, or a Merry Christmas! I do not want your happiness and cheer! What’s that, buying presents for people you like on a specific day? Capitalist Heresy! You and your Holidays! Did you know that the etymology of Holidays stems from Holy Days? I reject your happiness AND your religious affiliations! And don’t use the generic term “happy,” because it might offend people with depression, so you may ONLY call these strange periods of time “Neutral Days Off.” At least, until we get rid of all days off, and you may only greet a person with “Neutral Day” as you labor ceaselessly in the union factories for our great country! Don’t even THINK of saying Good Morning or Good Night, because Good assumes an objective idea, and all Good is subjective, subjective to the will of the Party! NEUTRAL DAY TO YOU AS WELL!

Political correctness is the end of anything good in the world. It’s a land of bullshit, filled with delusions and crazy people who must force their ideas onto everyone else. That’s why we lose; because we don’t try to make everyone else agree with us, or suffer the consequences. How ironic is that?

But Holidays? What next, are you gonna attack the White House and move the capital?

Have a Happy Thanksgiving, and a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Years, and good will and cheer to anyone else who celebrates whatever they celebrate. Just… have a good time.

[Rant Over]

It seems (to me) like there are two kinds of people: those who want more laws and those who want less. And then there are those who don’t care.

The strongest plants don’t grow on their own: they grow in diversity. If you try to protect yourself from diversity, you become weak and dependent on your protection.

Humans = Bacteria.

What good is logic without the freedom to use it?

What good is a life if it can never be lived?

You may be comfortable in the company of enemies, but I say there is no value in a belief if you are not willing to die for it. You may as well have none, because when it comes to, they are worth just that.

I am surrounded by noise, and I scream into the nothingness. No reply. I guess I’ll be here awhile, then. Waiting. Waiting, for my day. It may never come. Still, I wait.

Working on a short RPG called Soul Reaper. Purgatory RPG about getting out of the Otherworld before your killing drives you mad. Free until finished, and in a pretty format.

https://lotus-rpgs.itch.io/soul-reaper